NFL Night 1 2012

Tonight I'll be doing a live blog during the game looking for great stories and things noticed throughout the game.  Come join me.

5:00 p.m. -  Amazing to me that Jason Witten is gonna give this a go tonight.  We're not talking about football, we're talking about a life at stake.  I really hope he gets it done because he's on my fantasy team, but at the same time I want to see him play a few more years.  Take it easy out there buddy, but you are one of the grittiest guys I know right now!

5:15 -  Eli Manning interview.  My centerpiece for Fantasy Football this year.  I need him on top of his game, and I'm tired of hearing about how he's the third best Manning QB in the house.  Who has more Super Bowl rings?

5:15 - Oh good, a performance by No Doubt. When did they get back together?  I wonder if Gavin Rossdale is secretly jealous of his wife's success?  Are they seriously still making music?!  I also heard Mariah Carey performed at the start of the show. What in the world is going on here?  They must be warming up performers to be potential has-been halftime shows for the Super Bowl, that's my only guess.

5:31 - Game time.  Michael Strahan looking sharp with his huge gap and new job with Kelly Rippa (sp?) on the NEW Regis & Kelly.  I hope it's everything he's dreamed of.  His therapist must have told him to get more in touch with his softer side in his post-NFL days.

5:37 - National Anthem Time.  Queen Latifah! Yes!  Keeping up with the theme of has been performers tonight.  My odds are on her as being halftime entertainment of the Super Bowl this year doing a song AND stand-up comedy.  This sounds like a wannabe rendition of We Are The World or something.  At least we can count on her not screwing up the lyrics...

5:40 - I knew it!  Witten doesn't need no stinking Waiver to play.  He denied doing that, and that makes me confident he's not just brainless going out there and putting himself in harm's way.  Well done Witten, you truly are a beast.  I hope you score 3 TD's tonight.

5:45 - Eli 3 & out.  Not the start I wanted for my fantasy year.  Meanwhile, Rocky Bernard doing some sort of jig for his sack on Romo.  That was healthy.  Giants D does their best to get Eli back out on the field for me.  Thank you D.

5:47 - Best Tweet of the night so far:  Faux John Madden ‏@FauxJohnMadden

With the Cowboys offensive line, Tony Romo might finish the game with a lacerated spleen too.

Gotta love Faux John Madden....

5:52 - Eli moving the ball now, seems they're settling down nicely.  Until a false start penalty happens, talk about drive killer.  Come on guys!

5:55 - When did Rob Ryan change his name to Bob Ryan?  That just sounds awful, plus you look like a total slob too.  Come on man, clean yourself up.  I'm afraid I won't get dinner tonight cuz Bob Ryan will take it all out.

5:57 - And the rookie Wilson kills Eli's best drive so far with a fumble.  Time to keep Bradshaw in until he's dead tired.  That'll get you demoted REAL quick rookie.  Thanks for playing...

6:02 - Witten's first play of the game?  A false start...  I'd say he's a little "jumpy" to get rolling here.  It's obvious the Cowboys' o-line is afraid of JPP.

6:05 - My suspicions have been confirmed.  Chris Collinsworth is just as bad as he's ever been.  Where's Madden when you need him?  And people didn't like Kornheiser on MNF?  Give me a break, this guy is a weapon.

6:07 - How is it that "Damn Wilson" is now trending on Twitter?  This affirms the fact that no one has anything productive/constructive to say on there.

6:07 - Cowboys get stopped on 4th & Inches for first time this year.  How many times will that happen the rest of the year?  Eli's back out there nevertheless ready to finally put a score on the board.

6:11 - End of Quarter 1.  What a drag so far.  First game rust is what we'll chalk that up to.  It can only get better from here, that's the good news. 0-0 deadlock.  A couple of real football juggernauts duking it out here.

6:12 - What's the over/under on how many times we'll see this horrible commercial with these 2 numbskulls running down the beach only to plow into a fridge?  On the beach?!  How dumb do you have to be?!

6:14 - Great start to the 2nd quarter.  Eli takes about a 30 yard sack.  Well done Eli, just give yourself more room for pass yards.

6:21 -  At this point in the game it's hard to tell who the better team is out there.  Pretty sure Romo's the leading rusher of the game with that last scramble, and there's been more penalties than positive yardage plays.  A delay of game?  Romo pick!  Almost back for a pick 6!  If Eli can't score here, I'm dropping him...

6:24 - Clearly Bradshaw is not gonna get the job done here.  Bootleg, Eli.  Come on!

6:25 - Replacement officials just totally boned Eli.  That was a hold all the way.  Not your fault Eli, you're still my starter.  Lawrence Tynes owners have to be feeling pretty good about their draft pick right about now.  Even better if you picked him up as a free agent.  And they say kickers are useless in fantasy...

6:29 - Nothing quite like watching Ice Cube argue with a Coors Light.  That never gets old.  It might overtake the stupid fridge commercial as worst ever.

6:33 - Wow that Cowboys o-lineman just got schooled.  Welcome to the NFL, rookie.  Pierre-Paul is going to proceed to eat you for dinner tonight.

6:35 - Good news is Manning's already scored me 4 points tonight with 83 yds passing!  Great job Eli!  Not sure he's gonna hit his projected 28 at this rate...

6:42 - Hey false start!  4th of the night for the Cowboys!  Keep it up guys.

6:43 - Witten sighting!  He's on the board!  He'll quickly make up for that false start with clutch plays like that.  Spleen still in tact, he looks ready to rock.  Get him the ball Romo.

6:45 - Strahan looking solid in his neon yellow softer side shirt for Subway.  Are they keeping him as a sponsor now that he's a daytime color analyst?

6:50 - Who is this Ogletree fellow?  He's making himself quite a name tonight.  Literally and figuratively. I like that name Ogletree.  Thinking about calling my first born that.  7-3 Cowboys.  Time for Eli to pull his head out here, do one of those late in the half drives.

6:53 - Second drop for Victor Cruz tonight, maybe this isn't Eli's fault that the Giants are looking so bad.  This is getting pathetic.  Maybe they should pick up TO?

6:55 - Halftime 7-3 Cowboys.  It can only get better.  Already excited to see who the halftime entertainment is.  I'm going with Blues Traveler.  That being said, what the heck happened to Christina Aguilera?  She looks like she devoured the younger version of herself for a late night snack.  Get a grip woman.

7:02 - Eli Suave making a play for the coolest car commercial of the night after the soft horn STOP notification Altima.

7:04 - Oh great Bob! Just what I wanted to hear about at halftime of an NFL football game, the Democratic National Convention. Give me a break.  I heard earlier they moved the opening game from Thursday night to Wednesday so as not to interrupt President Obama's speech.  This is just unacceptable.  If you want to listen to him speak then DVR it or DVR the game.  It's not like it's a state of the union address.  Ludicrous...

7:08 - That reminds me, I need to record tonight so I can listen to Bill Clinton go off the handle with his "unapproved speech".  Should be a classic.

7:14 - Demarco Murray starting to come into his own here.  He may be a tad tentative since the Giants ended his season last year.  Best fantasy trade I ever made was trading him for Julio Jones 2 weeks before he got hurt.  I looked like a genius there!

7:17 - You gotta be kidding me Ogletree!  Who are you?!  Dez Bryant/Miles Austin owners everywhere are pulling their hair out.  I wonder how many Waiver wires have just gone out to claim Ogletree now...

7:21 - No clue how this is possible but Miles Austin is trending on twitter right now and Kevin Ogletree is not.  We need some insight on the average IQ of the Twitter user these days...

7:24 - So now the replacement ref is also an 8th grade Geography teacher.  This guy can just do it all can't he?  Kind of a weak call there on the block in the back after letting that holding in the end zone go earlier.  Come on man!

7:26 - Eli Suave starting to throw darts now and the WR's are actually holding onto them.  I always thought Eli played better from behind.  The tempo is finally starting to pick up in this game.  I wish he still had that mullet in the commercial though.

7:28 - Boom!  Just like that Eli's in the game, sweet pass, sweet grab.  Hixon you are the best looking WR out there tonight for the Giants.

7:29 - And of course it has to be Bradshaw taking it in for the first TD of the night.  Not helping me here Coughlin, there needs to be more play action in the red zone.  Nice drive Giants, gaining momentum here for sure.

7:30 - Clutch acting by Greg Jennings there.  I never would have expected him in an Old Spice Commercial. That was classic.

7:35 - Witten catch #2!  We're starting to get good consistency here.  Witten might have 100 & a TD before all is said & done.  Menawhile the Giants D is slowly imploding.  That's alright, keep Eli in the hole here.

7:40 - You gotta be kidding me Giants. Tony Romo is destroying you with his arm and his feet.  Pathetic...

7:42 - Ogletree dang near had TD #3 on the night.  That would have been a nice debut for him.  Eli still behind here, I smell another dominant drive coming up.  Or maybe that's just the wife's fish tacos I smell...

7:43 - Skinniest picture of Bill Parcells I've ever seen.  Reminds me of a young Christina Aguilera, we all know what happened to her.

7:49 - If anyone knows how to blow a lead it's the Giants.  That's why Romo tries to score as much as he can as soon as he can.  Manning's infamous for game winning drives.  Bring it on.  Win this one for Fantasy!

7:52 - What? Felix Jones is hurt?  What did he do, fall off the bench?  I didn't even see him come into the game!  Good golly, that guy is like glass.

7:56 - 13 minutes to go, plenty of time left for a Cowboys collapse.  Gotta hope the Giants' D holds up first. This is shaky at best.  Eli Suave needs to get his mullet ready.  Oh look second delay of game on Romo.  How this team wins any games is beyond me.

7:57 - Ogletree!

7:58 -  Who is the Cowboys' 3rd string RB?  I may be interested in picking him up.  Felix Jones is a has been.  Not looking good for a Giants stop here.  Romo picking them apart once again.

8:00 - False start Cowboys?  No way!  That o-line has been unshakable all night long!  It's only the 5th one!  Doesn't matter, the Giants can't get to Romo anyway.  This is absurd.

8:02 - Dez Bryant's extra 30 minutes before lights out just got revoked due to that illegal motion.  He was just getting bonus points for extra privileges this week too.  No worry, Demarco Murray bails him out yet again.  Giants should just let the Cowboys score here and let them try to get it back right quick.

8:04 -  What?  A flag?  On the Cowboys?  3 posts in a row here with a flag, 4 out of the 5 last posts.  And does it matter? No.  Giants can't stop them, Cowboys have to stop themselves.

8:05 - Flag.  Holding on the offense.  Geez.  I think they're doing it on purpose to just waste time on the clock.

8:06 - Touchdown Cowboys to Miles Austin.  There is another receiver in the building tonight besides Ogletree, it's a shame though.  Would have loved to have seen the hat trick.  Eli needs a miracle now, at least get me 300 yds dude.  That's not lookin good either...

8:08 -  This just in from @FauxJohnMadden again:

Faux John Madden ‏@FauxJohnMadden

NFL Facts: Tony Romo is a perfect 1/1 for 34 yards and a TD on 1st and 30 situations on a Wednesday Night.

8:10 - Going on 40 minutes of Slick Willie talking at the DNC, waiting for it to end already so I can go out into the living room again.  Got 2 things recording at the same time so I can see this train wreck after the game.  Guess I might need THE HOPPA'!  Stuck in the bedroom for now...

8:13 - A sign of life, the Giants ground game.  Bradshaw getting it done, need an Eli TD here at least to salvage this week....

8:14 - Hey what do you know, Victor Cruz has as many drops as the Cowboys have false starts tonight.  This is atrocious.  Cruz will be the most highly dropped player on the waiver wire next week...

8:18 - Good to see the teacher from Idaho enjoying himself out there tonight.  Not too shabby for a replacement ref.

8:23 - TD Eli! YES!  Even holds after a flag, it's a miracle!  Now we need an onside kick.  Eli salvages his season as my starter.  Don't make me throw Dalton in there...

Hello? LeBron, are you there?

Allow me to stretch my blogging fingers from a long winter's nap as I try to come out of hibernation here.  If you're anything like me and have been watching the NBA finals, you may have noticed a thing or two.  First off, how the Heat haven't swept this series 4-0 is beyond me.  You build a 15 point lead in game 2, and a near 10 point lead in the 4th quarter in game 4 and still manage to play bad enough to lose?  Give me a break.  I haven't seen a choke that bad since my little cousin choked while attempting to eat a turtle burger.  Haven't had one of those?  Google it...

The fact of the matter is 1 factor stands out above all of the rest.  King James is going from first to worst in a matter of a few days.  Let's look at the 4 game progression.  Game 1 he has 24 points, that's not bad!  Good solid start to the finals and leading the Heat in scoring.  Stuff it LeBron playoff haters!  He's here to get it done this year!  Game 2, 20 points and 8 rebounds, yeah that's not too bad considering Wade scored 36, that was a great compliment LeBron, nicely done.  You can't be the prom king every game.  Both performances mind you are at home, so not that bad.  As stated, he can't be the main attraction every night.  There's plenty of performers on this team that are going to shine.  Kind of like if you combined every Cirque du Soliel to play at the same Vegas hotel on the same night at the same time in different rooms, you'd have quite the difference of interest from night to night.  Some nights you just want to see the naked one, and some nights you want to see the water one.

Games 3 and 4 move to Dallas.  I started to think LeBron didn't make the trip with the team.  Game 3, the King has 17 points and 9 assists.  Not incredibly bad, but when you're probably one of the two best players on the team, not to mention the highest paid, you can't afford to be the 3rd highest scorer on the team in the NBA Finals.  It's just not going to get it done.  When you have the Playoffs reputation that King James does, you can't afford to not be on point in the big show.  I agree with the masses here, you have yet to prove yourself as a prime time performer such as one #23 over in Chicago a few years ago.  You have a history of "giving up" when it's time, and I was just about to shed that persona for you...

Then Game 4 happened.  The Heat escaped with their life in Game 3 and I figured they'd be ready for battle on this blustery June evening.  Now let me state my allegiance for the Finals, my standpoint has always been "Anybody but the Heat" since the playoffs started.  Don't mistake this blog as me being a fan of the Heat, that's just not the case.  Ever since "The Decision", which was the biggest waste of an hour in my life since I ate Popeye's Chicken next to a rest stop in El Centro and barely made it to Yuma.  It wasn't pretty.  That being said, I finally saw the spark in Miami's eye and figured I'd go for the jugular and bet $5 on the Heat with one of my long time co-workers.  He took the Mavericks.  I've seen too many Mavericks chokes in the 4th quarter and knew I had the advantage if this game was close at all in the 4th quarter.  Of course I had to forget about Game 2, what were the odds there, right?  I'd might as well bet on someone getting struck with lightning twice on the same golf course.

All of a sudden, lightning struck twice.  The Heat take a 9 point lead with about 8 1/2 minutes to go.  I'm figuring my betting partner is swearing at his TV as we speak and I am feeling great.  Then the lights go out in Georgia...  Before I know it the game is over and I'm left with MY jaw open only envisioning my work comrade laughing at my horrible Facebook picture and taunting me because he's now $5 richer.  I go to the Box Score on ESPN to see what happened...  Are you kidding me?  LeBoring has 8 points/7 assists/9 rebounds.  Another coworker today tells me "Oh he almost had a triple-double didn't he?"  Look, when you're the highest paid player in the NBA and you don't even manage to score double digit points in the Finals, you did NOT almost pull off a triple-double in my book.  You have officially retained your title of Playoff Disappearing Act of the century.  Not only am I out $5, but you have successfully managed to single-handedly fall back into your own routine and brought your team with you.  Granted you somehow pathetically manage to be the 3rd highest scorer on the team for the game, so it's probably not ALL your fault, but you realize had you probably had 4 more points your team may just have pulled this off and made me $5 richer.

I won't even talk about shameful Mike Bibby's 0 point contribution, and I'm not expecting Joel Anthony to actually be an offensive producer in this league.  That's not why you hired him.  But come on King James, when was the last time you had a single digit scoring night?  You had 1 other game ALL SEASON in which you scored under 10 points against Golden State, right?  I don't care what team you played against if you have 1 game out of 82 played where you scored under 10 points, we'll forgive you for that.  But watching possibly the ugliest 4th quarter in the NBA Finals in my 30 years of existence that I can recall, you did absolutely nothing to help your team to victory.  So you officially remain where you started in this whole conversation, as a Playoff CHOKER until your prove differently and I hope & pray that Dallas takes you to town and beats you in 7 games.

LeBron, maybe you should worry less about your State Farm commercials and focus more on how to stay on top of your game until the middle of June.  Nothing would be better than a Game 7 defeat, on my 30th birthday nonetheless, by Dirk and the Mavericks who oh by the way, managed to beat your pathetic self with a 102 degree fever in Game 4.  Did anyone else score in the 4th quarter besides "Prince Wade" and "Ze German"?  Not that I recall, but I'm sure someone did.  It might be time for a role reversal to "King Wade" and "Jester James".

Welcome to NFL Week 2

I'm going to attempt to do something a little crazy here, while watching football on a Sunday afternoon I will try a bit of a live blog from things I'm seeing going on.  Currently it's 12:40 p.m. so I will make time marks and continually edit the blog as events unfold throughout the day.  Just a warning beforehand I am a Seahawks fan and after 1:10 p.m. West Coast time, it will probably be pretty heavy on the Seahawks postings, stay tuned...


12:40 p.m.
Watching the end of the morning games on my Sunday Ticket compliments of DirecTV.  Not really compliments of, I paid out the butt for this programming...  I'm currently watching the Red Zone Channel (RZC) and am convinced this channel is perfect for those of you with NFL ADHD...  The guy hosting the channel is literally eating lunch while talking about all the stuff going on and just gagged.  This is high intensity.


12:45 p.m.
It's becoming very apparent to me that the Vikings are either just toying with the Dolphins or are actually bad.  Favre may think he doesn't need training camp, but all signs point to he does.  QB's this morning in general are awful.  Carson Palmer, bad.  Joe Flacco, less than stellar.  Vince Young, benched.  Only one showing signs of life is Matt Ryan and he's playing the Cardinals.  Welcome to week 2 Cardinals, it's the beginning of the end.


12:49 p.m.
This just in, Matt Moore has been replaced by Clausen down in Carolina, QB's are a dime a dozen today.


12:51 p.m.
Bears have all but sealed the deal against the Cowboys with a Forte TD.  Are the Bears good or are the Cowboys just awful?  I think a little bit of both.  Romo looks mediocre at best has a ton of weapons vs Jay Cutler who looks pro bowl caliber and his #1 receiver sounds like I just sneezed.  Aromashodu?  Bless you...  Oh whoops, Roy Williams just fumbled, give it up Cowboys.  They look like the Cardinals...


12:59 p.m.
41-7 in Atlanta, Max Hall gets his first taste of NFL action.  Another QB being benched?  Is it the blowout or the performance?  I'm thinking it's performance based.  Oops, he just threw a pick.  Turns out the Cards are bad and the Rams are worse.  Good news for Seahawks fans. :)


1:05 p.m.
Cowboys get a FG, signs of life.  Onside kick here to try and recover to keep them alive, too little too late in my opinion.  Bears go 2-0 with a successful recovery of the onside.  Who knew?  They've done it, Bears make the Cowboys look foolish.  On the battle of who could care less home front, the Chiefs just downed the Browns in a thriller.  Seneca Wallace, can't say I miss him.  How did he end up starting in Cleveland?  Things must be in bad shape.  Congrats on 2-0 Chiefs.  Now the Seahawks need a 2-0 as well.  It's just gotten under way.  Here we go!


1:10 p.m.
Wow two 3rd & 7 conversions to 1st down to start the first drive for the Hawks, this is lookin' alright!  I'll be sure and keep you updated on the battle of who could care less part 2, Rams/Raiders.  Should be a bloodbath...  I am becoming a fan of Bradford, just wish someone decent would have gotten him because at this rate he might be dead by week 6.


1:16 p.m.
Touchdown Seahawks!  No wait, holding offense.  Awesome...  2 penalties in a row to screw you up from 1st & goal on the 1 yd line.  1st & Goal on the 16!  How many chances will the Broncos give us?  Tampa Bay 2-0?  Like a full moon or something.  Oh awesome, Hasselbeck picked off by Bailey.  I'm having flashbacks of last week....  This "Good Cop Bag Cop" routine Southwest Airlines is doing is pretty good.  It just wouldn't have felt right had the Seahawks scored on their first possession in the game.  It just isn't supposed to happen that way.  Wait, Norv Turner still has a job?  I used to think a loss to the Chiefs meant an automatic dismissal...


1:25 p.m.
I'm actually getting pretty excited to witness my first Tebow sighting in this game.  I hope he gets a couple snaps.  Not this drive though, looks like it's time for the Broncos to punt.  Oh unreal, a fumble on the punt return.  This is why people drink bloody mary's on a Sunday morning/afternoon.  Seahawks love to give themselves every disadvantage possible.  Seahawks are making Orton look decent, something about the NFC West making good QB's look stellar....


1:30 p.m.
Way to let Royal roll into the end zone there Hawks...  Nothing beats digging yourself into an immediate hole.  They just said it's 92 degrees in Denver?!  I didn't know that was possible.  Two turnovers already for the Hawks, this is embarrassing.  Eagles are trying to win it for Vick.  The Lions are actually looking decent this year.  Andy Reid just looks huge.  Pretty sure I just saw him order lunch on his headset.  Lions lose....  Cowboys and Lions have the same record, do they play each other this year?  Could be a shootout.


1:36 p.m.
Tony Siragusa "Goose" is the sideline guy for the Seahawks game.  To what do we owe this honor?  He looks like he was in a couple seasons of The Sopranos.  He and Andy Reid should wrestle.  Hawks continue to shoot themselves in the foot, 4 penalties already.  It's over 100 degrees on the field!  In Denver!  I can't believe this.  My awesome wife just went to get us Chicken Nuggets at McDonald's.  It's the only thing that sounds good to her being under the weather.  My mouth is already watering, now I know what Andy Reid feels like.


1:39 p.m.
What?!  We're in the second quarter in Oakland and it's still 0-0?!  Who would have thought that possible.  My prediction for this game is 6-3.  Rams win by default because they have Stephen Jackson, who does Oakland have?  McFadden?  Shoot, I don't even know.  Rams need to put it in the end zone.


1:42 p.m.
Arian Foster trying to pick up where he left off last week with what I'd call a pretty decent week.  The Texans could be a potential Super Bowl contender if they keep this momentum up.  Only 15 more games to go!


1:45 p.m.
Rams score! 7-0, there goes my prediction already.  It's ok, I'll take it coming from Bradford.  Rams are going to win that so we need the Hawks to win this so there's not a 3 way tie for first place in the NFC WORST.  Lost all our momentum with all of these penalties, we look like ASU and the penalty bug.  Frick, trick play from the Broncos, Seahawks D looks half asleep.  Could be a long afternoon here...


1:49 p.m.
Uh oh, Ryan Mathews carted off the field in San Diego.  Not a good sign for the Charger faithful.  I'm not sure but it appears as though the blackout is in effect in San Diego as they didn't sell out, please correct me if I'm wrong.  Everyone must have decided to watch the Raider game instead...


1:55 p.m.
14-0 Broncos, this does not bode well.  Hawks need to get something going on here.  Still no Tebow, it's painful on all accounts...  Man, Chargers are bad, Jaguars are way worse.  This should be a gimme.  Still waiting for those nuggets to show up.  I'm starvin'!  Darren Sproles just has to be loving how he shows the Chargers time after time he produces and they still don't make him the starter when LT leaves.  Mr. Durability award goes to Sproles in my book...


2:10 p.m.
Hasselbeck's new nickname: "Drive Killer".  He looks ridiculous.  Anything thrown over 6-7 yds is completely off.  Give your defense a break...  Sanchez finally got a TD for the Jets offense.  Welcome to the 2010 season! Those nuggets were great....


2:16 p.m.
We love to not hold on a 3rd down & long.  Work so hard for 2 plays then take the 3rd one off.  Time to limp into the locker room...  Need to regroup here, this is getting out of hand.  Still no Tebow :(


2:22 p.m.
Ryan Mathews the self healer is back out on the field already.  Bad news for Sproles fans, he resumes his duties as head bridesmaid.  Orton looks like he can't miss right now.  Oops, he just missed, a bit low.  Whew, Broncos have to settle for a FG.  And they get the ball coming out of halftime.  Not a good combo, score points and get the ball back.  Maybe I'll get to see Whitehurst perform?  Need about a perfect 2nd half to have a shot here.  Redskins are looking pretty solid here.  So much for that Super Bowl prediction of the Texans.  Still a half to go however...  Schaub always does something crazy.  Stat of the day: Steelers force 7 TO's against the Titans.  Something you need when playing with your third string QB in the game.


2:31 p.m.
Revis you just got OWNED by Moss.  Glad you held out of camp all preseason cuz you're so good.  Yeah get your hamstring worked on like that had something to do with it.  You should have to pay some of your check back every time you give up a TD like that, that was awful.


2:34 p.m.
Good Sunday night commercial for Eli vs. Payton tonight.  Like Archie would be driving either of them to the game...  Get real.  Well maybe now after what happened to Brady.  Can't afford to get in a car wreck.


2:38 p.m.
It should be illegal for all games to go to halftime all at once, let's space this out a bit!  I don't need to see all the highlights, I've been here since it started.  All morning games were awful in one way or another.  Afternoon games are shaping up that way too....  Jets/Pats has some hope.


2:45 p.m.
3rd & 10, can the Seahawks hold?  They need too.  I like the Kyle Orton surender dive, that was pretty good.  Contact's not his thing.  And they fail to convert the third down.  Time to score now!  Hold onto the punt dillweed....  Sweet return!  Just about made up for your early mistake!  Now we HAVE to get in here.  Bag Cop time again.  These knuckleheads are making quite the name for themselves.  


2:50 p.m.
1st & 10 on the 11 so basically 1st & goal come on Hasselbeck...  He's trying too hard to get the ball to Carlson.  Spread it out!  You can do this.  Touchdown Obomanu!  I love saying that name out loud.  Sounds like something you played in band back in high school.  I was a master Obomanu player....  Hawks are getting back in the game. 


3:00 p.m.
Now if we can get a quick stop here and get the ball back we'll keep the momentum going.  Knowshon?  Yeah I know him.  He's not doing much with those pitches and draws.  3rd & 8, big stop we need you now!  Oh what do you know, pass interference.....  Come on Babineaux....


3:01 p.m.
Tebow sighting!  Just standing on the sideline next to his buddy Brady Quinn.  Meanwhile Knowshon finally got it figured out.  Way to go Seattle D, you just screwed the pooch there.


3:05 p.m.
This does not bode well for a comeback.  Ball's on the 1 yd line and it's 3rd & Goal.  Need a miracle here to keep the Broncos out of the end zone.  Field goal wont be a back breaker.  Seahawks D just doesn't get pressure on the backfield at all, then when it looks like they do, they give up a 45 yd play.  Touchdown Broncos, this is bad.  Letting the team down D...


3:15 p.m.
Are you kidding me Hawks?  You need a field goal anyway down 17.  Dumbest throw of the day and it wasn't even intercepted.  About to give up and watch Bradford polish off the Raiders.  Carroll makes his first big dumb call of the season.  Oh an offsides on the Seahawk D.  Fancy that.


3:20 p.m.
Benched QB update.  The Raiders have benched Campbell and put in Gradkowski who scored.  Welcome to Oakland Campbell.  Have a seat.  It's gonna get worse (somehow) in Oakland before it even thinks about getting better.


3:25 p.m.
Jets put the Brady's in the hole.  Not sure if you knew this but Jacksonville is horrible.  Houston's trying to salvage something in Landover.  Gradkowski not looking bad against the Rams, not looking good either though.  Rams are looking even worse.  I wonder what the guys that draw the Raiders assignment to broadcast on Sunday say/do when they find out they've got the Raider game.  I'd be asking my bosses if they hated me.


3:29 p.m.
Week 2's official title is "Backup QB".  David Garrard out in Jax, McCown in.  All over but the crying pretty much in Denver, Seahawks have officially given up.  About time to take a shower I think...  Gradkowski trying to put the Raiders out of reach for the Rams.  Might be winning himself a starting job too.  Maybe the Raiders should have gotten Leinart?


3:35 p.m.
Houston's about to go down to the Redskins.  So much for my Week 1 prediction of Seahawks/Texans in the Super Bowl.  Wow the Jets just picked off Brady.  Totally different game from their pathetic Monday night game.  Oh man Houston just blocked the FG, maybe I spoke too soon.  Plenty of time for Schaub to work his magic.  Seahawks are still running like they have a chance to make it a game here between plays.


3:40 p.m.
Arian Foster having a normal game today after his 10 minutes of fame last week.  Bradford's falling apart, that makes me sad.  I don't know who I can't stand more, Tom Brady or Rex Ryan?


3:45 p.m.
Still bummed that Tebow hasn't been used yet today.  It would have eased the pain of this loss a bit had he gotten out there.  Hasselbeck is now just throwing up prayers and hoping one of them gets answered.  Might as well be praying for a Jaguars win.  Not gonna happen.


3:49 p.m.
I spoke too soon with the Texans.  Schaub is putting together quite the drive here.  Could be a good ending here...


3:52 p.m.
Are you kidding me Andre Johnson?!  4th down & the game and Schaub just throws one up for Andre.  Game tied, 2 minute drill for McNabb.  I'm not sold on his 2 minute skills.  The Skins really shafted themselves here.  Texans deserve this...  Meanwhile Bill "Cranky" Bellichek isn't having a good time.  Shoot Gradkowski threw a pick, Rams aren't out of it all the way.  So much for that starting job next week...


4:00 p.m.
Patriots have just lost without a miracle happening.  Sanchez just made them look silly on the goal line.  I love a good Patriots loss.  Cranky's got a mediocre team on his hands this year yet again.  But Brady really does have pretty hair.  Has Bradford done something good here?!  They're trying to overturn a call, but I haven't seen it.  Yes it is, TD Rams!  They're not done!  Bradford refuses to go away.  That and the Raiders suck.


4:05 p.m.
McNabb is giving Schaub a chance to win the game, no OT required.  Rather the offensive line with holding penalties is giving Schaub a chance.  Patriots wait until 5 minutes to go to put together a very efficient drive.  Oops nevermind, Brady sacked and fumbled.  Jets win.  Seahawks lose...  At least College Gameday is headed to Boise next Saturday!  Here we go BSU!


4:10 p.m.
Looks like OT in Washington.  Then punter wasted 3 seconds by running around like a chicken with no head to end it.  This will be interesting.  Hopefully McNabb remembers that you CAN in fact end an NFL game in a tie.  He'd better try and do something.  Unfortunately the Rams are gonna come up short and go to 0-2.  Depending on what happens tomorrow in San Fran, it could be a 2 or 3-way tie for 1st in the NFC Worst.  Hey Cowboys, how does it feel to have the same record as the Rams?  Better yet, a worse record than the RAIDERS!  Raiders even had the backup QB in, way to go Romo.  OT is starting, remember McNabb, it will end after 15 minutes of no scoring.


4:15 p.m.
McNabb might not even have to worry about OT rules if he doesn't get out on the field.  Nice drive going here Schaub.  Arian Foster refuses to be forgotten after last week keeping his name in the stat book.  Tom Brady, you have been pimp slapped by Mark Sanchez today.  How does it feel?


4:20 p.m.
Green Bay, Pittsburgh, Chicago, Kansas City, Tampa Bay, Miami.  Congratulations, you are the only undefeated teams left as of right now.  It's only Week 2... Houston or Washington will join you after this, possibly the Giants after tonight if Eli beats Peyton, and the Saints hopefully when they beat the 49ers.  Quite the stellar short list after only 2 weeks.


4:25 p.m.
Gano for the win here, Washington is counting on you buddy!  First one good, but a timeout will make it null.  Way to call it Texans.  Give him time to think about it.


4:26 p.m.
Gano kicks it and it's "Ga-no good".  He boots it wide right.  Amazing how the ice timeout actually works on these guys.  Schaub you'd better win this here.


4:33 p.m.
Good call refs, he caught it and now they've gotta be in Rackers territory.  Line it up, get it over with.  Redskins fell apart here today.


4:37 p.m.
Rackers makes an appearance for the win!  Will he be iced?!  My guess is yes.  No ice timeout, Rackers puts it through, Redskins complete the collapse.  Oh the mayhem!  What a day of sloppy football.  This day shall forever be remembered as the day of the "Backup QB".  Hopefully Eli & Peyton put on a show tonight, although I think I'm done watching football or my wife might never talk to me again...

Thank You For Flying With Us (Pt 2)

After spending a fabulous week in J-ville, FL, the night before we were to return to Phoenix I started getting a little nervous.  It took me a minute to figure out why, but upon realizing there was a flight and a connecting flight involved, I knew that chances were pretty good something was going to go screwy.  Especially after our initial flight, I had a reason to be worried that something might go awry.  Let's just say that Delta Airlines didn't disappoint with the mayhem.

It was a balmy 88 degrees with about 92% humidity that fateful afternoon/evening we headed to the J-ville airport.  You could sift the air through your teeth, it was brutal.  Our flight was due to leave at about 7:25 J-ville time, and things were already looking sketchy.  An attempt to do early check in online a few hours earlier proved to be quite the ordeal.  After a few failed attempts at checking in, I finally had to call Delta to figure out what was going on as it was telling me we were ineligible to check in.  As it turns out after talking to Doris, magically on top of our already scheduled connecting flight in Atlanta, they also had us somehow connecting in Philadelphia.  Great, a phantom flight!  Delta you continue to impress.  After a few minutes, Doris had everything straightened out and thankfully we still had our original itinerary.  Check in complete, maybe we had the worst of it behind us for this trip.  Yeah, right...

After a successful check-in at the airport counter, we headed towards the security gate and stopped briefly so my niece, Samantha, could get some souvenirs to take back with her.  I thought I'd take a quick glance at the flight monitors to see how we were doing.  Oh look at that, the flight's already been pushed back to 8 p.m.!  What a surprise!  I just got in the building, can't you let the suspense build up a little bit first before making everything haywire?  Well, now we at least had time to eat some food.  The highlight of the evening it would be.

After a quick dinner, I decided to go up to the gate desk to see how we were looking.  Oh no, that line is way too long for things to be ok.  I asked the gentleman standing in front of me what the prognosis was.  He quickly replied in a sweet tone of voice, "We're not leaving til' 8:30 now."  Instantly, a wave of semi-nausea ran over me.  Our new arrival time was 9:41 ATL time, our departure time to PHX was 9:40.  This was not going to be good.  I thought to myself, 'What is wrong with THIS flight?'

No sooner did I ask myself that, then the attendant came over the loud speaker explaining how it was delayed due to the plane being "too heavy" before takeoff and how they had to "de-fuel" the plane to readjust the weight.  This apparently takes an hour or so to do.  De-fuel a plane?  Are you kidding me?!  I can hear that announcement happening on that plane now, "Uh yeah, folks this is the captain speaking.  It turns out we're a tad too heavy fully loaded.  We can't take any people or luggage off this flight, so what we're going to do is remove the fuel from the plane and put a little less back into it.  Don't worry, we will have PLENTY of fuel!"  This is very similar in my opinion to someone telling me that maintenance is on board the plane fixing an issue. It doesn't make you rest easy.  Less fuel than intended?  Are we going to make it?  Delta, you are amazing!  You know how to make everyone feel at peace!

It becomes clear quickly that they're telling people they won't make their connecting flights and making people hotel reservations.  This line is going nowhere fast.  Obviously, no one in the line is in a good mood, including myself.  I've never been stuck like this before, it looks like my streak was coming to an end.  Meanwhile, there's 1 Delta attendant at the next gate over looking for different airlines to get people out on time and hopefully still catch the connecting flight.  She's asking people if they are flying to certain cities to come see her at that desk, everyone else just stay in line.  Funny, no one's going over to see you, how about taking some of the load off of this line?  No?  Ok, just checking.  Eventually she wanders back over to our terminal, as no one is taking what she has to offer.  Thirty minutes later, it's my turn at the gate.  As soon as I get up to the front, another attendant comes out of nowhere and tells me to meet her over at the other gate the other attendant was just at.  Perfect!  This circus just keeps getting better by the minute.  Meanwhile I'm telling my traveling companions that we're probably staying the night either here or in Atlanta and to get the proper people notified.

The attendant promptly tells me it's not looking good.  She really knew how to talk straight with me.  Her final suggestion was to go to Atlanta and see somehow if we could make our connecting flight, as that flight was a little delayed leaving its destination.  It still showed leaving on time at 9:40, but nevertheless it's worth a shot!  If not, we could see some of the finest lodging Atlanta had to offer.  All I had to do was get their "I'm stuck here and don't have my luggage" kit when we got there, and I would have necessary toiletries to get me through the night and a fresh t-shirt.  Awesome, I hope they have a XXL kit.  Maybe the shirt says "I got stuck in Atlanta and all I got was this stupid t-shirt."  I'd go for that.  She talks me into going to Atlanta, and we're all set.  After doing a "quick turnaround", we are all on board from the late arriving plane and ready to take off.  I stand up to get something and hear 2 attendants behind me attempting to do something they are obviously struggling with.  I turn around and notice they are trying to put a ceiling panel back into place.  Great, the roof is falling off inside the plane.  Delta, perhaps it's time to update your fleet a bit?  Oh well, it's just a ceiling panel.  The attendant promptly asks me if I could help them out as they are both about 5'0" on a good day, and well, I have a little height to lend to the cause.  "Sure," I said, "I'll put the roof back together for you."  Let's roll!

So we take off at exactly 8:30, flight's still scheduled for 9:40.  Flight's scheduled to be an hour and ten minutes.  The captain tells us we have a 50 minute flight ahead of us, which gives us just a small glimmer of hope.  This will be nothing short of a miracle if we make it.  Now we will be landing at approximately 9:20 at gate B4.  Luckily, we were moved from row 40 on the plane to row 16 due to all of the people cancelling and just trying again tomorrow in J-ville.  We all know how fun it is de-boarding a plane.  It can take 10-15 minutes just to get off of the dang thing.  We get off the plane into the terminal at approximately 9:30, and quickly discover our departing gate is B34.  B4 to B34, we're not out of the woods yet.  Remember previously what I said about Atlanta being the busiest airport in the world?  Even at 9:30 at night that theory holds up.  We had to make like a bakery truck and haul buns down to B34 as the attendant at B4 was screaming at us telling us to hustle, they were waiting for us at B34.  Do you know how hard it is to run with your shorts falling off your waist?  I wasn't fully prepared to be running, as I had not put a belt on.  This did not help any.

About 3/4 of the way to B34, we come upon a gentleman dressed in a captain's uniform.  He was at approximately B26 and he yelled out to us, "Are you going to Phoenix?!"  To which we promptly replied, "HOPEFULLY!"  He retorted back with, "Well they're not going anywhere without me, so you're ok."  We instantly slowed down just a bit to a very brisk walk.  As we got within eyesight of B34, the attendant was out in the hallway screaming at us like a drill sergeant, "GO GO GO, come on Phoenix!"  I instantly thought to myself, 'Why are they trying so urgently to get us on the plane when Captain Fantastic back there is either getting a biscuit to eat, going to the bathroom, or getting a magazine for the long flight to Phoenix?'  Amazingly enough we were walking onto the plane at 10:39.  They even waited an extra 5 minutes for what looked to be other passengers, but I think the real story was Captain Fantastic doing God knows what in the terminal.  They promptly closed the door after the 5 minutes and we were backing out.  I was only half paying attention but I never did see the Captain come back on board.  I'm half convinced that guy was just some crazy old man that dresses up in a captain's costume and walks around giving false hope to passengers in a frenzy.  Nicely done, sir.

We had done it!  The impossible!  We were on the way to Phoenix!  Man what a relief, and man was I warm from running through the halls and jumping onto a stuffed plane.  Let me just reach up and get that air vent on me...  That's weird, there's no air vent?  First time ever I've been on a plane with no personal air vent.  Maybe there was some technological advance out there that made it possible to not have the personal vents, I could feel the air blowing, it was doing ok.  No sooner do I think this to myself then I hear a guy 2 rows in front of me asking where the vent is because he's warm.  The flight attendant promptly responds to him "Yes sir, this plane was built BEFORE the invention of the personal air vents, I'm sorry about that."  Holy cow, are you serious?!  We are on a dinosaur plane, maybe this plane is grandfathered in and they will let us smoke on it, because I might need a cigarette to get us through this flight.  Once again Delta, you have put me at ease knowing the metal can I'm flying on is as safe as a newborn in his mother's arms.  NOT...  A 4 hour plane ride in a plane that was built BEFORE they made personal air vents.  How many of those have you been on?  Unreal Delta...

Safe to say we made it back to Phoenix at about 10:45 p.m.  The streak is still intact, and I didn't have to spend the night in Atlanta.  Maybe next time...  Delta sent me an apology letter earlier this week for all of the mishaps that went on that glorious evening.  They even were generous enough to give me an extra 1,000 frequent flyer miles for the inconvenience.  Thanks Delta!  Not quite sure I want to be using what I have now dubbed the "Dinosaur Airline".  But we'll see, who knows what the future holds.  Riding on a plane that was invented before air vents, watching them try to fix another plane for 2 hours with no luck, and riding on one that the ceiling panels were falling off doesn't make me feel like jumping right back on the next flight.  Yay flying!

Thank You For Flying With Us...

Alright, look.  I don't really know where to start here, but somehow I will get this out.  I recently just returned from a fabulous vacation in the lovely city of Jacksonville, FL and had a wonderful time.  Visiting some family and basking in the Florida sun (and rain) was one of the best vacations I've had in a while.  Possibly ever if you count a vacation as only being when you actually go away from where you live for an extended amount of time.  The action fired up as soon as we arrived and didn't let up until the minute I returned to Phoenix.  Let me just list a couple of the events and you will understand:  NASCAR race in Daytona, fishing for anything that would eat a shrimp in the ocean (sharks), eating seafood by the pound, swimming in the immaculate Atlantic Ocean, watching fireworks in the channel by St. Augustine on a boat...  You get where I'm going here, it was nuts.  I barely remember sleeping there was so much going on.  Only 2 things happened that brought this trip to its knees: the flight to Jacksonville, and the return flight home to Phoenix.

Let's start with the flight to Jacksonville, it's amazing how 1 airline practically intentionally tries to ruin your trip singlehandedly.  So we depart at 6:05 a.m. which means we arrive at Sky Harbor at approximately 4:30 a.m. You feel like you walk into the set of a zombie movie when entering this airport at this hour.  I'm pretty sure no one's really awake there, they are just going through the motions.  Surprisingly doing the early check-in has benefited us and we are through security with bags checked by 4:45 and are waiting for the flight which is ON TIME.  Score, who said this trip was going to be full of peril?  Nothing like catching the first flight of the day out of this frying pan.

So we're all standing around waiting for the first set of the "elite" passengers to board when I glance over and see a woman with a small baby walking my way.  She's on her own this flight, and has that smile on her face like "my baby is the coolest thing since sliced bread, why don't you all look at him and comment on how precious he is".  This did not bother me because I'm sure some day I will have a kid and will want the whole world to see him/her.  So she decides to walk over to within about 5 feet of me and waits to board, no big deal...  I glance back over one more time as she makes some googly talk to the baby, mainly because I was laughing at her talk when I was blind sided by the mother of all awkwardness.  The broad was breast feeding like she was the only one in the airport.  Now ladies, breast feeding is no doubt a very necessary/critical whatever you want to call it way of feeding a newborn child hands down.  But have you no shame woman?!  If you want to make a dude feel awkward in a public scenario, start breast feeding your kid with no cover.  Sure there's the perverts that probably think it's awesome, but even they have to ask themselves "Is this right?"  Are you trying to attract the perverts?  Do you not realize what you're doing here?  Cover it up!  I can't think of anything close that compares with what I could do that would be in parallel with this except throwing my pants down in the corner of the terminal and going #1.  Who wants to see that?  Yeah I know it's a boob, but we don't have to be dirtbags everywhere we go, right?  Ladies, don't expose yourself to the filth of the world like that!

It gets worse, guess who sits down in the same row as me on the opposite side of the aisle.  You guessed it.  My first thought was, "well at least she got the feeding out of the way before she boarded".  Nope, she wasn't even close to done.  She had a 3 hour flight and she was planning on using ALL of the flight time wisely.  As soon as the plane got to elevation and the captain made the electronics are OK announcement, she was back at it before I could plug my headphones into my phone to listen to the Avett Brothers.  It took every ounce of me to not say "COME ON LADY!"  The guy next to her was really enjoying it though and no he wasn't traveling with her.  I just closed my eyes and tried to sleep like a sardine sleeps in a sardine can for the rest of the flight.  I'm sure you can imagine me sitting in coach on a 757 Boeing.  It's not the most normal sight you've ever seen.  Only 3 hours and I was in Atlanta, 3/4 of the way to vacation!


I'm not sure that everyone knows this, but I read a fun little tidbit that said that the Atlanta airport (Hartsfield-Jackson International) is the busiest airport in the world.  Don't ask me why, but upon arriving I would not disagree.  There's 5 terminals and an underground tram/walkway that takes you to each different terminal. At least it was easy to lose the breast feeder... We arrived at terminal C and luckily had to work our way up to terminal B.  A short 5 minute walk, plenty of time to spare.  Upon arriving to our gate in the B terminal, we realize we have plenty of time as they are just now unloading passengers off of the arriving flight from La Guardia that will take us to JAX.  Thank goodness, everyone had time to go pee.  The first thing the gate attendant says over the intercom is "We are unloading the passengers now, and the mechanical staff is on board trying to diagnose an issue, we should be taking off approximately 30 minutes after our scheduled takeoff."  Ok, if you tell me that mechanics are investigating an issue on a plane I'm about to get on, you're not doing me any favors.  First of all, you don't want to tell them to hurry up because that would be bad.  Secondly, I do not want to watch a bunch of wrench monkeys work on my plane and keep me in the busiest airport in the world any longer than need be.  This is where you realize the mechanics might have the crappiest job in the airport.  You can't win for losing.  Oh well, at least I had a little time to charge up my now nearly dead phone.  Little did I know my phone would be fully charged before we left that god forsaken airport.

An hour and a half AFTER we were supposed to take off, amazingly the plane's pilot comes out and decides to give us his 5 cents worth.  He begins explaining how there's an air control module that shifts oxygen from one side of the plane to the other in an emergency situation and blah blah blah..  We get the point man, we want that fixed before it takes off.  Low and behold, they've already replaced the part and it's still not functioning properly.  This does not bode well.  We should have been in JAX by now feeding our faces with shrimp and scallops.  He thanks us for being patient, as always like we have a choice, and goes back to the plane. The anxious crowd continued on watching the wrench monkeys stare at the under belly of the plane pointing and gawking surely just putting on a show for us passengers at this point.  They know they're not fixing this plane soon.  Come on, man!

About 40 minutes later, the gate attendant tells us they are fairly certain this plane isn't going anywhere and they have started looking for a different plane for us to take to JAX.  There's a novel concept, odds are in our favor as the ATL is one of Delta's main hubs.  Just pull another one out of the hangar and let's rock!  Easier said than done, I know.  All of a sudden it was like a stampede of water buffalo running from a pride of lions from gate B01 to B24.  The attendant tells us they have found a plane and we'll be boarding at that gate heading to JAX.  Thank you, 3 hours later...  So we get to B24 and it's not an "end of the terminal" gate, just one of your standard side pocket gates for lack of a better term.  Talk about shoving 10 lbs. of fat into a 5 lb. bag.  Now 300 people are swarmed around this gate like a lynch mob.  Our new lovely gate attendant tells us that we will be boarding shortly as soon as the crew gets to the new plane and does their pre-flight checks.  Let's do this!  About 30 minutes later, the gate attendant tells us they've lost the crew and are "looking for them".  How the @&%* does this happen?!  They were on a broken plane sitting there all by themselves.  Did they sneak out the back door on the dining truck?  That's what I would have done...

Ten minutes later, the crew comes walking up and it appeared as if the crowd was ready to stone them all.  The captain decides to get on the intercom for one last brief update.  "Yeah ladies and gentlemen, sorry about that but they decided not to inform the crew that we were switching planes so we've been sitting on the broken plane for the last half hour wondering what's been going on.  Sorry about that!"  Hey nice job Delta!  Talk about putting the cart before the horse, they almost got a crew killed that afternoon.  Shortly after that we boarded and were in the air arriving in JAX at 5:30 as opposed to 2:30 as scheduled.

And this was just the flight TO the lovely town of Jacksonville.  More to come in tomorrow's blog on the return nightmare flight home...

World Cup Woes

Ok, so I was just as excited about the World Cup firing up as the next person.  I will be the first to admit I haven't been the biggest follower of soccer since about after 6th grade, but for some reason Olympic Soccer and the World Cup seems way more intriguing to me.  Living in the USA doesn't help in trying to follow soccer.  Recently, however, I have been able to follow what is probably one of the "best" leagues competitive wise in the English Barclay's Premier league via a channel on satellite dish plus XM radio for my listening pleasure.  This has helped me learn a tremendous amount about the world of football in quite a short time.  It really can be very intense, and lots of action can happen.  It is quite amazing when a goal is scored, there are so many ways it can happen.  Kind of like snow flakes, no 2 goals are the same.  But I digress...

The World Cup fired up last Friday and I was ready for hours of intense action.  These are the best footballers in the world and the action was going to be intense from beginning til end of every 90 minutes!  Maybe because I thought this way, I let myself down a tad.  It's now the end of day 4 and 11 games have been played.  That's 22 teams that have competed.  Out of those 22 teams, exactly 3 teams have scored more than 1 goal.  As stated previously, I am not the hardened soccer viewer, but that seems a little low to me.  I know most of these guys just kind of joined together and haven't gotten a chance to gel in the matter of a month or so since most leagues just ended across the world.  I have watched parts of at least 4 or 5 games over the weekend, and the action seems to be less than stellar for the most part.

I'm starting to have flashbacks of the 2004 men's "dream team" disaster that happened in the Olympics.  All of these guys get together at the last minute, practice a couple of times, then go out and try to dominate the world.  We all know how that ended.  They were almost dubbed the "disaster team".  No one will deny the NBA has some of the greatest talent in the world against most of the other countries as far as American players go.  If you can't be committed to playing as a team and practicing together and getting into a flow, it's obvious you can be beat.  As we've seen so far in the World Cup, a lot of world powers are struggling out of the gate.  It turns out there's not enough time in the tournament to bond as a team because if you lose a game in the pool play, you might be done before you can get started.  Heavily favored teams are getting by by the skin of their teeth in these matches, some are losing.  If you're not at peak performance come day 1 of the Cup, you could be hosed.

Do these guys need more time to bond together before they hit the pitch in the tournament?  If you watched any Friendlies before the tournament started, there were quite a few head scratchers that left you wondering how well some of the better teams would do.  I didn't know what to expect from Team USA, as the English were heavily favored.  The effort put forth by the English, however, was less than stellar.  Dang near all of these guys play in the "NBA" of soccer over in Europe.  They are the best of the best.  They looked like they hadn't played a match together in their life.  You may have seen my bold statement on Facebook about whoever won that match would get my loyalty throughout the tournament.  After that it was impossible to show loyalty.  Yes the English were heavily favored and walked away with a mere tie, USA looked to be playing lights out but really couldn't get much done.  And let's be honest with ourselves, that goal the Americans got was all but gift wrapped.  It seemed the Americans had 1 legit shot in the 2nd half that was about ten times harder to defend against, and England's goalie did a pretty good job of shutting it down.  After that performance, it was impossible to pick a team to support.  Don't get me wrong here, I'm American through and through, but I am also a realist and know that in the end good soccer will prevail and that's what I want to see.  I thought I was positive that the red coats would be a dominating force and be easy to root for as when was the last time USA came home with a trophy?  I'm just setting myself up for heartache rooting for them aren't I?  Now only another match will tell, so I have to hold off until Friday to see if a real team shows up.

I know not all of the best teams have played yet, but come on.  Germany scored 4 goals in a match!  They're not the powerhouse of this tournament are they?  Maybe as of teams that have played so far they are it.  I just don't know any of the players on Germany, so I find it tough to root for them.  It's kind of like rooting for team Slovakia in Olympic basketball.  Who plays for them?  Even if they were on fire, how fun is that?  Do people really live in Slovakia?  Oh wait, is Goran Dragic from there?  He's cool.  South Korea scored 2 goals.  I'm surprised they were allowed to play in the tournament.  And the Netherlands scored 2 this  morning against Denmark.  Not 2 countries that come to mind when you think of a football powerhouse.  

Italy won the 2006 Cup if I do recall, and they barely squeaked out a 1-1 tie against the awesome country of Paraguay!  Paraguay?  It took me a minute to remember that country is actually on the South American continent.  I know there's some stellar South American teams out there, but Paraguay doesn't come to mind in the top 2 or 3 countries from there.

I'm not sure what the remedy is here, but maybe the World Cup is too soon after most seasons end around the world.  The players keep complaining about how exhausted they are.  That's never a good sign.  You have to exert a little energy while playing soccer, and when you're exhausted it's no fun.  Tomorrow we have Brazil playing, they're bound to take it to North Korea, right?  Well maybe Kim Jong Il will have the crazy Koreans fired up tomorrow, but Brazil should have the ways & means of thoroughly spanking them.  If that ends up 1-0 or 1-1, I may just throw the World Cup in the toilet.  Please don't make me go back to watching the Diamondbacks, because that's the only option I have left right now.  Maybe the College World Series, that would work better.  Time to get it fired up World Cup!!!!

Most Excellent Chain of Events In A Long While

You know how you have one of those days where a lot of actions take place that tend to revolve around a certain person/object/place, whatever?  One of those times where things start out so high and end so low or vice versa?  No?  Just me?  Well today was one of those days for me and a certain object of mine.  The highly coveted (NOT) Xbox 360 went from good to worse as they day progressed, leaving me with no choice but to voice my opinion to my trusty followers.  I know, it sounds kind of lame, but bear with me as I'll try to make it slightly entertaining.  The overall goal here is to show you how awesome Microsoft (maker of said Xbox) really isn't, and hopefully help you avoid problems like this in the future.

So I purchased my Xbox 360 in February of 2007.  No I did not retain that in memory, I was told that by the lovely Microsoft support agent I talked to on the phone.  The original purchase including another game I wanted at time of purchase came out to roughly $400 when it was all said and done.  The 360 itself I believe was $299 plus tax, but a couple of games I had to have were tacked on at $60 a piece.  You get the hint here, not a cheap investment for something that could keep me entertained with awesome gaming while doubling as my DVD player.  It was thought that it would last me for years!

About a year and some change later, I began experiencing problems with the machine, it would not be able to read discs randomly to the point where I couldn't watch a movie or play a game, it would just lock up on me.  So I called Microsoft support only to find out that the Xbox has a 90 day limited warranty and my issue was not covered, but if I sent it in to get repaired for $100, that would get me a new 1 year warranty and an awesome 1 month subscription to Xbox LIVE! Gold account.  Xbox LIVE! is where you can go online and play against others out on the interweb.  Not something I was too keen on doing, but I finally gave in and sent the machine in to be repaired for $100.  One other note about Xbox LIVE!, this is not a free service.  In order to play against others online, Microsoft charges you a measly fee of $50 for a year's worth of access.  Not too bad you think until you realize Sony's Playstation 3 and Nintendo's Wii will let you play games online free of charge.  Microsoft at its finest.  I'm still not sure to this day what Microsoft thinks their competitive advantage is that lets them think they can charge people for online access, but that's Microsoft.  They don't really need a reason.

About a week later I received my "repaired" Xbox, which in doing some quick investigating, I was dang near positive they just sent me a refurbished unit as the very next day after they received my unit, another one was promptly shipped back to me.  This after being told it could take 2-4 weeks to diagnose the problem and figure out what was wrong.  Thanks for the prompt service Microsoft!  You look like heroes!  All the while sending out someone's previously broken hunk of garbage that you dolled up to be in working condition with a couple new parts in it.  I didn't care, I was just glad to have the console back and working.  Total price to own this machine now $500+.  But I have a new 1 year warranty, sweet!

Fast forward to early 2010.  The wonderful invention of Netflix has just given me the ability to watch movies streaming online.  If only I had an Xbox LIVE! account Gold subscription for the $50/year price tag.  I'm already paying for Netflix, and on top of this I need to pay Microsoft $50 of access for a year so I can access my Netflix account.  Oh, and I don't have an internet connection at my TV which means I need wireless capability.  Oh wait, the 360 doesn't come with wireless capability.  I have to buy the Microsoft wireless adapter, retail value is about $75 these days I believe.  It used to be $100.  I finally break down and buy a gently used one on ebay for roughly $50 to get internet access.  Once again, PS3 and Wii have built in wireless connections.  Microsoft being Microsoft part two.  Ok Microsoft, you win in the nickel & dime game, I will buy this dongle, but I'll show you!  I won't buy it brand new and save some money and the proceeds will go to some 15 year old who got grounded and his mom forced him to sell his adapter on ebay and go outside.  Thanks childhood obesity nightly news reports!  New cost of owning said 360 now a whopping $550.

Upon arriving, I promptly plugged in my freshly purchased wireless adapter and found that sweet ticket Microsoft sent me for my $100 contribution to their fund.  The 1 month Gold LIVE! account, to try out all of the sweet amenities they had to offer.  I would be watching Netflix and gaming online with FIFA 10.  How sweet life is...  This was about the end of April.

About 2 weeks ago, I was playing in the middle of an intense FIFA 10 match (not online), when all of a sudden the TV made a god awful noise and froze up.  I wasn't quite sure what happened, but I thought nothing of it and rebooted the machine, it's Microsoft right?  Just reboot.  Upon rebooting it did the exact same thing making the same awful noise dang near deafening me.  Being in the computer industry somewhat, I knew something was instantly wrong.  My heart sank a bit, I knew my 1 year renewed warranty had expired.  What do I do next?  Google it!  Heck yes!  Instantly found my problem online and was told the hard drive might be going bad, and to try and reformat it.  Now if only I could boot it up and let it last long enough to reformat without freezing up on me.  After a couple of tries it was success!  It was fully functioning again!  Although, I lost every game I had ever played and saved progress in.  That was a little disheartening, but small price to pay for said investment.

Everything worked great, for about a day.  Then the same problem again, I had come to terms with the fact the hard drive was probably shot and would need a new one.  Ebay never looked so good.  Again...

Today was the day, it turns out a new hard drive with the same capacity as my old one runs about $25 used on Ebay.  No problem, I won the gem and instantly paid for it.  With shipping, $27 running my cost of the 360 to a tad shy of $600.  What we won't do for entertainment...  I also acquired a year of Xbox LIVE! activation card today and was ready for the hard drive to arrive.  I would be watching Netflix and gaming with that kid who was no longer grounded in no time!  Hopefully he found another wireless dongle somewhere...  Sucker.

So today I get home and decide what the heck, I'll fire the 360 up and see what happens.  Everything worked normally for about 5 minutes and then I got the deathly screech and freeze up again.  Game over, man....  I try the trusty Xbox trick of removing the hard drive and seeing if it works normally, which would confirm the rumors of the hard drive going bad.  I remove it and turn it back on.  Xbox 360 fail...  This time it didn't even boot, it made the awful noise and I got the infamous Red Ring of Death.  Long story short, that means the hardware inside the Xbox is shot and it needs to be repaired.  Don't pass go, don't collect $200, you get the drift.  I also knew that this problem is an issue they've been fighting since the 360 came out a few years back and Microsoft had been so generous to give an extended warranty for this exact problem.  Awesome, call them up!

Before I could dial the phone, I got an email from paypal stating the payment I made to the person for the new hard drive was refunded with the seller comment "Item is broken."  Awesome, thanks for the heads up!  I thought to myself, 'I'll deal with that later, now I need to get this piece back to Microsoft.'  Once on the phone with Juan, I was promptly informed that the extended warranty was only good for 3 years from the purchase date which was Feburary 2007, which means my extended warranty expired February 2010!  I said, "But Juan, I sent my machine in about 2 years ago and you sent me this handy dandy refurbished unit the very next day.  This isn't my original machine!"  Juan promptly replied, "Yes sir, but it is 3 years from the original purchase date, that is all I can do.  I can submit a repair request and for $120 we will do the Microsoft dance on your hunk of junk and send you another crappy refurbished unit with a 1 year warranty and 1 month of Xbox LIVE! for free."  Price of Xbox would push it up over the $700 mark.  At this point I bow out, "No thanks Juan, you just lost a Microsoft customer for life" and hung up the phone.

In the blink of an eye I lost my gaming system, my online access to Netflix, and my DVD player.  Now I have no way to watch Netflix, guess that means I have to cancel my Netflix account! Done and done.  Thanks for nothing Microsoft.  I always thought that whole joke of "you buy something and it breaks the month after the warranty expires" was only a joke.  Well this one made it approximately 3+ months before it decided to give out.  So I'm sorry Netflix, but I had no choice but to get rid of you.  Microsoft, if you're listening, I'm not sorry and I'd love to see the numbers of lost sales due to your crappy products.  Or how about the numbers of people who bought your products then promptly switched to the alternative?

To everyone else listening, my advice is don't buy Microsoft.  They nickel & dime you to death for crap that's already outrageously priced.  This pretty much rings true in their software world as well as their hardware world, and no one should have to go through this.  Sony, you just won yourself a new customer.  Now I just need to be able to afford you...